It takes a special sort of person to open their home to foster a child. And in the case of Robert and Margaret Isdale of Lincolnshire, England, it was more than just a single child they brought into their home. It has been more than 150 little ones that have been given new chances thanks to the Isdales.
For more than 45 years, the couple has never wavered in their commitment to helping kids. “It’s something we always wanted to do and we enjoy doing it,” Robert said. It’s not just a duty, they said, it’s a calling. Despite their age, they say that as long as they are able to foster a child, they will. “
I would say to anybody, no matter how old you are, if you want to do it, go for it.”
While many might find it difficult to part with children after forming bonds, Robert said the role a foster parent plays in a child’s life is so important. “People say, ‘I don’t know how you can give them up,’ but you’ve got to understand what the role is,” he said. “You’re giving the child a safe and loving environment until parents can be found.”
Robert and Margaret Isdale were awarded for their dedication to fostering children. The couple has fostered more than 150 children. Photo by BBC News
Married for 58 years, the couple said that while rewarding, there can be emotional challenges while fostering. “It’s a bittersweet thing when they move on because you form attachments to them, but you have to move on and quite a few of them keep in touch with us and their families,” Robert said. “We think it’s really quite a pleasure when they move on, not because we want to get rid of them, but because meeting new families and seeing them settled in is lovely. The longest time we’ve had a child with us is four and a half years.”
They are often not forgotten, either, by the adoptive parents. One particularly touching moment was when they were asked to be the godparents of a little girl they had fostered for 14 months. “It made me cry,” Margaret said. “She’s such a lovely little girl and her adoptive parents are lovely as well.”
Among the many children they have fostered, one case stands out. In 1987, after three years of caring for a little girl named Kim, who had Down syndrome and a complex heart condition, the Isdales decided to adopt her. Doctors had given Kim a life expectancy of just 6 to 9 months, but she defied the odds and lived until she was 21.
Kim’s life was filled with joy and adventure. “She taught us a lot. She was lovely, she had a good sense of humour, and she went everywhere with us,” Robert reflects. Tragically, Kim passed away while on vacation in 2005, a loss that was deeply felt by the family. “We took her off on holiday and we came back without her. But she had a full life,” Robert says.
Robert and Margaret Isdale adopted one of their foster children, Kim. Photo from BBC News
The couple, who also have two biological children in their 50s, is currently fostering an 8-month-old baby boy. Despite the challenges that come with caring for a newborn, the Isdales embrace it with joy. “Sleep? What’s that?” Margaret joked. Their unwavering dedication has not gone unnoticed. They were recently honored with a lifetime achievement award for their service to fostering.
“It’s really quite humbling. It’s not about us, it’s about the kids we look after – they’re the important ones,” Robert said. Michelle Sawmynaden from Lincolnshire Fostering Service praises their incredible contribution. “Their dedication to the fostering service over 46 years has been absolutely incredible. The difference they’ve made to children’s lives has been fantastic.”
Reflecting on their journey, Robert and Margaret find the most rewarding part of fostering to be reuniting families. Robert said, “People say, how can you hand them over? Well, that’s part of what we do. When you hand a child over, and the adoptive or birth parents keep in touch to express their appreciation, that in itself is a reward.” Watch below for a look at another couple, from Oklahoma, who have fostered more than 200 children!!!!
